Chantelle’s Story
Chantelle became a Kinship Carer when her teenage granddaughter moved in with her. Chantelle had felt trapped in an abusive relationship for many years before this. As a result she did not spend much time with her granddaughter as she was growing up. She was hopeful they could now build a relationship together and she would help support her granddaughter to keep her safe. However, Chantelle felt isolated and alone whilst trying to care for her. She did not know where to go for advice and support. She was not familiar with the term Kinship Carer and did not know this was the role she had taken on. It came as a relief when she finally got in touch with a local project set up to support Kinship Carers. It was a comfort to her to find out she was not the only one caring for her grandchild.
Life of a Kinship Carer by Chantelle
At times it can be a nightmare
We have our good days
We have our bad days
What I would do for them all to be good days
We have happy times
We have sad times
Some days the happy outweigh the sad I often wonder why?
If only I could turn back the clock
And been there in her younger days
I try my hardest
Even when at my lowest
But I keep going and fight on
No two days the same
One day I’m sure I’ll get there
Chantelle’s poem tells of her love for her granddaughter. Even when things are at their most challenging, Chantelle tries to support her granddaughter as best as she can. Chantelle’s regret is that she was not able to be there for her granddaughter when she was younger. She wonders what difference this could have made to the good days and bad days she talks about in her poem. Chantelle has a much loved drawing of a rose that she received as a gift from her granddaughter. This is very special to her and reminds her of the good days.
Chantelle’s photograph of the trees in the snow, reminded her of peace and calmness when she looked out at the view.
Chantelle is often worried that she feels judged by others. This has affected her confidence and self esteem. Expressing her feelings through art has helped Chantelle. She says, ‘I’m enjoying painting as I don’t feel judged for who I am. I know I’m not perfect, but I’ve always tried my best’.
It has helped Chantelle to have other Kinship Carers to talk to. ’I’ve gained so much confidence from getting support. I’ve been able to do lots of training including safeguarding. I lacked confidence because of my past and couldn’t do a lot of things. I couldn’t speak out in a group’. Chantelle has realised the importance of receiving correct support. This has influenced her decision to help other Kinship Carers. She attends a Kinship Care group and offers peer support.
Chantelle loves spending time with her family and has a special memory of a day out in the sunshine. Chantelle remembers, ’We had lunch out and it was a nice day with lovely views and no arguments. It is one of my happiest times. It was lovely’!
Chantelle likes to take photographs of the gifts she receives from her family. They remind her that despite the difficulties, things can be good.
